Stephanie March Alex Cabot

 

Stephanie March Alex Cabot

Stephanie March played the role of Alex Cabot on various Law and Order series including SVU. She was absolutely gorgeous but serious and hard-nosed as well. The way she dressed was unintentionally sexy. Even her neck was sexy. She was doing a guest spot on a skit comedy show similar to Saturday Night Live. They would have their guests star in silly sketches that were take offs of what they were known for. One of the sketches that Stephanie would be doing was a court room scene. This time the shoe would be on the other foot as she would be the defendant, though she was the district attorney.

She was being put on trial for being unfair and for being a bit snooty and judgemental. She was questioned by a cast member dressed up as a lawyer. He accused her of being up herself. She said that this was not true at all and that people were only projecting their own feelings of inadequacy upon her. She stated that it was her job to make the best case possible. There was a jury made up of actors from the show and a judge. The judge kept calling for order in the court even though no one was talking at the time. There was a running gag that the judge was slightly hard of hearing as well. It was made known that the jury was made up primarily of suspects that Alex had prosecuted. It was stacked not in her favour. There were also a few of her rivals on the jury as well and some that were jealous of her looks and successes.

The prosecutor chimed in again,” You are also accused of always looking like you are constipated.” This left her speechless. She did not know how to respond to that. She looked incredibly embarrassed by this. She tried not to crack a smile. He then said,” I think I can rest my case. I don’t think any more really needs to be said here, do you? This woman never laughs, barely smiles. She takes herself way too seriously.” She just shook her head.

The head of the jury then quickly chimed in,” I don’t think that we need to even discuss the outcome. It’s guilty, guilty, guilty.” There was an older woman on the jury who shouted,” The blonde skinny bitch deserves to be punished.” The judge strained to hear. He then pounded his gavel and shouted,” Guilty, guilty, guilty as charged. I sentence you to the gravest punishment that this court can hand down. A slopping.” The jury cheered and the prosecutor sneered.

She wore a grey skirt suit. The uptight solicitor was going to get completely covered in disgusting slop. This was a sight that many would be delighting in. She took a deep breath. She closed her eyes as out of nowhere, a deluge of sloppy mess began to rain down upon her from above. It was a mixture of disgusting sloppy food. It started with what appeared to be baked beans. They began to pour down upon her from above. They poured down her head and down her blonde hair. They slid down her glasses and down her face. They then poured onto her chest, down her neck. More dumped down her jacket and then over her skirt and all over her long legs. The smelly beans dumped all over her body as everyone applauded and laughed at her.

The baked beans were followed by other beans. There looked like there were chick peas, kidney beans, black beans and lima beans raining down upon her. They smelled horrendous and were swimming in sloppy juices. As she took off her glasses and tried in vain to clean them off on her lapel, spaghetti hoops began to pour down upon her. She gave a pained look as she was slopped with an ocean of spaghetti hoops in revolting orange sauce. It stained her suit and stuck all over her blonde hair. They could be seen dripping down her calves, all down her high heeled shoes.

The jury then began to pelt her with rotten vegetables. They exploded all over her body, leaving bits stuck all over her. As this was happening, sloppy creamed corn began to rain down upon her from above. It was thick and sloppy and stuck all over her body and head.

The whole thing was finished off by the prosecutor approaching and pushing her face into a giant tub of coleslaw. He then dumped it all over her face and body. It stuck everywhere. She sputtered and kicked her legs as she came face to face with the revolting, foul smelling slaw. Alex had truly got her comeuppance.