SI pies

These are stills from pieings at Sports Illustrated. They are all quite good. The full gallery is at:

http://tellygunge.wordpress.com/2014/10/07/si-pies/

Naomi Wilkinson mud bath

These are stills from CBBC Wild. Naomi Wilkinson gets a mud bath. It is very good and she barely seems to mind. The full gallery is at:

 http://tellygunge.wordpress.com/2014/10/06/naomi-wilkinson-mud-bath/

Hayley Tamaddon Andrea gets it

Hayley Tamaddon Andrea gets it

Lloyd’s daughter, Jenna, never liked Andrea. Andrea was Lloyd’s girlfriend. His daughter never trusted her and felt that Andrea was always up to something. She would take any chance that she could to get one over on Andrea. When she was given the chance to embarrass Andrea, she did not hesitate to take it. The scenario that played out was a simple raffle that was held at the Rovers. The idea was that the winner of the raffle would be able to choose anyone that they wanted to mess up. Lloyd’s daughter bought as many tickets as she could afford. She was hoping that she would win as away of humiliating Andrea in front of all of her friends and family. She wanted to make Andrea look ridiculous. 

The raffle results were going to be announced shortly. Andrea had no idea that the results were most probably going to be very much to her detriment. She was just enjoying the night. She entered the raffle as well, but only bought one or two tickets. Most everyone else entered the contest as well. They all only entered a few times though. The odds were really stacked against Andrea.

It finally got to be the time for the results of the raffle to be announced. Everyone waited to see who would be the winner. Jenna was praying that she would win. Liz was the one announcing the winner. She herself was hoping to win because there were quite a few people she wanted to see covered in mess, but she did not cheat or lie this time. She would reveal the true results. “Ok, everyone, it is time to reveal the results of the raffle. As you all know, the person who wins the raffle will get to mess anyone of their choosing up for everyone to see. This is going to be a lot of fun. Here we go everyone. Good luck,” she said. She reached her hand into the hat and closed her eyes.  She moved her hand around over and over, finally, pulling one piece of paper. 

“The winner of our raffle is… Jenna,” Everyone cheered including Andrea. Andrea did not think that she would be the one who Jenna would choose to mess up. She knew that she did not like her, but had no clue how vehemently she disliked her. Jenna stood up in victory and walked over to Liz. The two shook hands. “Congratulations, Jenna, you won the raffle.” “Thank you very much,” she responded. “Now the question is who will you choose to take the mess?” Everyone held their breath. Jenna pretended as though she was thinking. Andrea was smiling and waiting to hear who it would be. “Well, it is a hard one, but I am going to choose Andrea.” Andrea’s mouth fell open. Jenna gave her a nasty sarcastic look.

“Andrea, sorry, but you are the one. Can you come up and join us please?” Andrea was in shock. She reluctantly made her way up front. She looked at her boyfriend. He just shrugged his shoulders and looked at his daughter. There was nothing that he could really do except but to sit back and watch what was about to happen between his daughter and his girlfriend. When Andrea joined Jenna up front she looked at her with wide eyes. Jenna shrugged her shoulders and said, “Sorry,” in a sarcastic tone of voice. Andrea looked confused. She really didn’t realize how much Jenna actually did not like her. She was about to learn the hard way. “Jenna, what’s..” Jenna took her hand and pulled her closer. “I am going to humiliate you in front of everyone. I am going to teach you a lesson that you will never, ever forget.” Andrea’s eyes widened in shock.

“Andrea, can you please have a seat?,” Liz said. “Come on Andrea, sit that fat ass down and get ready to get filthy,” Jenna said, patting the chair. A shocked Andrea sat down on the seat in the middle of the pub while Liz, Steve and Michelle brought some buckets out from the back. Jenna was smiling from ear to ear. She had waited a long time for this. She was eating this up. 

Jenna was handed a massive sloppy banana cream pie. She held it out so everyone could see it. Andrea was looking out at everyone in shock. She barely noticed what was happening behind her. Jenna beamed as she relished this moment. She took a bit of a bow. She tapped Andrea on her shoulder. When she turned her head, Jenna smashed the pie straight into Andrea’s face, totally creaming her. She slammed the pie as hard as she could into her face. It hit her face with a massive thud. Andrea’s mouth opened. She screamed. Jenna twisted the pie around in Andrea’s face. It slopped her wavy dark hair. Her face was covered in sloppy pie. Andrea held her hands in front of her. She frowned. Jenna pointed and laughed at her. Everyone in the pub roared with cheers and laughter. Andrea looked absolutely despondent. Her face caked in creamy pie. She barely knew what hit her.

Jenna now grabbed one of the beer nozzles from behind the bar. She aimed it at Andrea and pressed down. She began spraying her father’s girlfriend with cold stale beer. Andrea screamed when the cold beer hit her body. Jenna moved it up and down her body, aiming it everywhere as if she was giving Andrea a shower. It washed down her body. She screamed and flailed her arms and legs. The foul smelling beer soaked her blouse, trousers and hair through and through. Her clothes became heavy with the weight of the wetness. Jenna took her time spraying all over Andrea’s body.

When she was finished, she walked over to Andrea. She grabbed her blouse with both hands and violently pulled it apart. Some of the buttons from her shirt went flying. Because of the wetness of the fabric, Jenna was able to tear and rip the blouse apart. She then reached down and ripped open Andrea’s trousers at the seams. She pulled as hard as she could, tearing the trousers apart. When she was down she threw them at Andrea. Andrea was now clad in her plain white bra and panties, which already contained numerous stains. The remains of her blouse and trousers were still strewn on her body. Everyone in the pub were slightly stunned. Some of the men whistled for Andrea. Andrea looked both shocked and annoyed at the same time. She moved her hands about attempting to cover her underwear from view.

As Andrea was distracted by this, Jenna was handed a tray. The tray contained a huge amount of pasta bake. It was all leftovers it was spiral pasta, covered in thick sloppy sauce and coated in melted cheese. It was greasy and sloppy. Before Andrea knew what was going on, Jenna took the baking tray and flipped it quickly upside down. The sloppy pasta bake fell from the baking dish and landed with a sloppy plop on Andrea’s head. It fell all over her face and all over her chest. Andrea grimaced as the pasta fell and tumbled down her face. Spiral pasta stuck to her wavy black hair. Andrea looked down as it fell down her body. Everyone roared with laughter.

Jenna was then handed a similar dish. This time it was filled with hot pot. This was something that was served in the pub on a regular basis. It was filled with lamb, flat cut potatoes, peas, carrots and a thick sloppy brown gravy. Jenna gave a funny, satisfied look as she came forward. This time, she took the dish and lifted it upwards, thrusting it straight up into Andrea’s face. Andrea started to scream as the dish made contact with her face. Her scream was muffled by the hot pot as it was stuffed into her face. Jenna pushed Andrea’s face deep into the thick mess. When she let go, Andrea’s face was a mask of brown mess. Peas and carrots stuck all over her face. Andrea raised her hands and tried her best to wipe some of the gravy from her eyes and face. It dripped the whole way down her body. Her cleavage was also covered in hot pot. Andrea could do nothing but shake her head in disbelief.

Jenna was then handed a large container of egg salad. This stuff was very thick, very lumpy, very yellow and very foul smelling.  When Jenna took it, she could instantly smell it. She waived her hand in front of her nose, indicating how badly it smelled. She smiled as she turned the container over on top of Andrea’s head. The disgusting salad slowly oozed from the container and landed on Andrea’s head. The atrocious substance fell onto her face and down her chest. There were massive lumps in it that stuck to her face and hair. She could hear people in the pub saying things such as “Eww”, “Yuck” and “That looks disgusting”. Jenna laughed loudly knowing how embarrassing this must have been for the woman that she hated more than anyone in the world at this point.

Jenna then took a very similar container, containing leftover coleslaw and liberally tipped it onto Andrea, just as she had done with the egg salad.  The coleslaw was white and sloppy with bits of carrot inside. The revolting substance sat on top of Andrea and fell down her face. “How’d you like that, you dirty bitch?,” Jenna whispered in Andrea’s ear. She was enjoying heaping the humiliation upon Andrea.

Finally, she was given some garbage bags from the back of the pub.  She took them in her hands. She wildly ripped the trash bags opened and let the contents fall out all over Andrea’s body. Bits of trash fell onto her and stuck to her everywhere. It was mainly food waste, but there were other forms of trash mixed in. Andrea clutched her hands tightly to her chest as the second bag of garbage was emptied upon her. Jenna bent down and looked her straight in the face. “Don’t mess with me,” she said angrily. She bowed and walked back to her seat.

Andrea did not know what to do. She looked up for some form of support, but did not really find any. She stood up and, as quickly as she could, walked out of the pub and went home. She wanted to get out of there as fast as she could. Lloyd did not know what to do. He did not know what to say to either his daughter or his girlfriend “ She is trash. She deserved to be trashed like the filthy shore that she is,” Jenna said.

Sam Faiers no escape

Sam Faiers no escape

Sam Faiers agreed to appear on a new game show that involved crazy games and stunts as well as various celebrities. She would do just about anything to make money and to get publicity for herself. She knew that the show might be a little bit embarrassing, but it did not sound as though it would be too bad for her. The game that she would be involved in would be played by one of the contestants.

Sam came out wearing a black bikini. It showed off her tanned, toned shapely body. She looked incredible. She must have known how amazing she looked. She smiled anxiously as she came on stage. She met the contestant that she would be playing with. She shook their hand. It was a twenty something young man. He looked very pleased that Sam was going to be his partner for this game. His heart beat quickly as she shook his hand. He had never really seen a woman looking that attractive in person.

The host then explained the game that they would be playing. The game was going to involve a lunch making machine. The machine would be sending items of food forward. The contestant was going to have try to catch them using a tray. Below the machine was a moving conveyer belt that Sam would be strapped to and laying on. If the contestant was unable to catch the falling foods effectively, it would end up all over Sam’s body. Sam laughed and pointed at him. “You’d better do a good job,” she joked. “Ahh, I’m going to get messy,” she squealed.

 The host helped Sam climb aboard the ramp. She lay down on her back, facing the ceiling. She let out a little squeal. There were little plastic straps. They were situated at her ankles and wrists. The host secured her wrists and ankles in the straps. She was now in place. The contestant was given the tray and the game was set to begin. Sam wiggled her toes. She gave a nervous look. The machine began to work. Sam’s body began to move back and forth on the conveyer belt.

First, the machine began to dispense soft serve ice cream, as if it was an ice cream machine. It went downwards and made a criss crossing pattern, back and forth over itself as if it was making the top of a vienetta or something. It fell downwards, the contestant tried to get there in time, but he could not. The ice cream began dispersing back and forth across Sam’s face. Sam closed her eyes and laughed as the ice cream fell onto her face. She wiggled her nose and chin a bit, but was helpless to intervene. Her body kept moving back and forth. The contestant was able to catch some of the ice cream on the tray, but by this time, the machine was already dispensing chocolate and strawberry sauce onto Sam’s lower legs.

“It’s covering my legs,” she cried out with a bit of a giggle. He ran over and began to do his best to catch as much of the sauce as he could on the tray. By this time, Sam was slathered in red and brown desert toppings up to her knees. “Oh my god,” she said. Meanwhile, two massive globs of tuna salad flew from the top of the machine and landed on her face and right on her toned abs. A close up was shown of it splattering all over her perfectly toned midsection. By this time, it was quite clear, that it would prove quite difficult for the contestant to save Sam from much of the mess that the machine was sending in her direction. He still tried his best.

As Her body passed through the middle of the machine, a tidal wave of rotten eggs fell down upon her. She stuck her tongue out with a nauseated looking face. She cringed. The eggs smelled atrocious and were soaked all over her. “How was he meant to catch that?,” she said. Sam was already half way covered in mess and the time was not even halfway through yet. Sam took a deep breath. At that point, thick brown gravy began to pour down onto her chest, all over her breasts and neck. She squealed as the thick brown mess soaked her bikini top and flesh.

Next, fruit salad spurted out onto Sam’s midsection. It piled onto her bikini bottoms, onto her stomach and down her thighs. It was sweet and sloppy. It was filled with grapes, cherries, peaches and pears. She winced as it slopped down onto her. The contestant tried hard to catch it, but only managed to catch the last vestiges of it as it fell through the air onto Sam.

Now the machine began to go into overdrive sending mess out in all directions.  Beef stew fell from one direction, mashed potato popped out and fell onto Sam’s  tummy.  Chicken korma poured on her face and salad dressing sprayed up and down her body, all, almost simultaneously. Salad fell on her from above. It was shredded lettuce, carrots, tomato and cucumber. It fell onto her body, producing a whole new layer of mess on top of her body.  Sam was now dripping in sloppy mess from head to toe. Finally, the machine and the conveyer belt all came to a halt. Sam wanted to say something, but she was totally covered in mess.

The host came over and undid the clasps at Sam’s ankles and wrists. Sam sat up and turned sideways, brushing off some of the mess. She held her hands in front of her. She shook her head and giggled in embarrassment. “I can’t believe this,” she said, shaking her head, “ I am a mess here. I must look hilarious,” she joked,” I am so embarrassed.”  She laughed, picking lettuce off of her face and hair. “He did the best he could, but let’s face it, that was crap.” 

It was a very embarrassing moment for Sam. She knew that everyone back in Essex would be watching this and getting a lot of amusement out of her misfortune.