Sarah Palin’s suprise

Sarah Palin’s suprise




Sarah Palin had hopes of becoming the president of the United States, but on this occasion things went entirely different for her. She was, perhaps, the most disliked woman in America. She had embarrassed herself and her party on numerous occasions with stupid things that she had said and done. She was almost unelectable and she did not even seem to realize it. Sarah had agreed to appear in a local charity event as a way to get a few more voters. She did not expect what the organizers had in store for her. People were frustrated with economy and the way the country was going. This event was designed as a way for every day people to showcase their frustrations. They would be getting the chance to take it all out on Sarah Palin and people were very excited about it. Sarah was not the most organized or thoughtful person, so she was not entirely aware of what the organizers of this event had in mind for her. Her handlers and entourage did however and they were only too happy to comply and do their parts to lead Sarah straight into what was awaiting her.



Sarah arrived as normal for any public appearance. She introduced herself and was told that there was not much time until she was set to make her appearance. This was not unusual for her. She was used to coming into places, making appearances and then leaving straightaway afterwards. She still had no idea of what was awaiting her. She wore a black skirt and suit jacket with a white button down shirt underneath and, of course her trademark glasses. She was announced and was welcomed on stage by a mixture of boos and cheers. She smiled and waived. As she entered, she noticed that there was a rather large item on the other side of the stage that was covered by a large red sheet of fabric. For a minute, she wondered what it was, but just assumed that it had nothing to do with her, so she forgot about it. “So, Sarah Palin is our special guest of honour at this very special charity event,” the woman on the microphone said,” Mrs. Palin has graciously volunteered herself to take part today. It is very charitable of her. Now we’ve been a bit naughty and not told Mrs. Palin everything. We have kept a special surprise from her. Does everyone want to see what it is.” Sarah was dumbstruck. She was totally speechless. She had not really been informed of what this surprise could possibly be. She did not know what was about to happen.

“Ok then, let’s reveal it” the woman said. She walked over to the object that was covered by the fabric. She shouted,” Wola!”, as she pulled the fabric away. When the fabric was pulled away, Sarah’s mouth fell open. What was revealed was a pillory. The crowd hooted and wolf whistled. The announcer applauded and used both arms to point at the pillory. The applause and laughter seemed to last forever. The catcalls filled the air. “So, I guess by now everyone can guess pretty easily what is going to happen this evening. We have the stocks and we have Sarah Palin. Obviously, we will be combing the two to make something even better. It will be like peanut butter and chocolate. Two things put together to make something even better. The two seem to be destined for one another. Let’s get on with it.”



She quickly tried to prance Sarah over to the pillory before she could protest. “Wait a minute,” Sarah tried to protest. She looked around in a panic for someone friendly to help her to get out of this situation. She looked at the members of her team. “It’s for charity,” one whispered. Before Sarah Palin could blink, she was herded over to the pillory. Her own team took her by the arms and escorted her over to the stocks. Another threw the pillory open. In a second she was gently pushed into place. The top was quickly lowered and the locked. In an instant, the potential presidential candidate was completely helpless locked in the stocks. She tried to move, but could not. She kicked her legs in protest, but it was to no avail. There was going to be no way out of this for her. So far nothing else had been produced, Sarah still had the hope that it would just be for pictures and that they would let her out soon. She was hoping that that would be the end of it, but in her heart she knew better. She now looked up from the floor for the first times to see a crowd of howling people laughing at her. She also noticed that most of them seemed to be carrying items in their hands. It then donned on her what was about to happen.



“So, this is all for charity. Sarah Palin is the target. We have hundreds here tonight. Everyone has donated money and in return will get the chance to totally pelt Sarah Palin with every kind of mess imaginable. How does that sound?” She put the microphone up to Sarah’s head. Sarah shook her head feverishly. “Nooo! Please don’t do this. I beg you,” she begged. The crowd was very amused to see the arrogant politician begging in the manner that she was. “You all must be democrats,” she hissed.

“Ok, Sarah, you may notice that everyone in the crowd is armed with a wide array of rotten vegetables. How we will start is very simple. The crowd is going to take those rotten vegetables and they will be hurling them at you. Isn’t that marvellous.?” The crowd all cheered in sheer joy. It was going to be a great opportunity for everyone to release some frustration and anger, all over Sarah Palin. She was the perfect target and certainly deserved what she was about to get. “Ok everyone. I will count down and on three, everybody throw your vegetables.” The woman moved aside so none of the mess would splash onto her.

“Ok, here we go, three….two…one.,..nail her!” With that the members of the audience began to hurl rotten vegetables at the helpless politician. Sarah Palin was in a prone position and could do nothing to resist apart from shutting her eyes. Instantly, hundreds of vegetables flew in her direction. Tomatoes, cucumbers, eggplants, zucchinis were just some of the vegetables that were flung her way. Some hit the target and others missed. A fair few flew through the air and hit her straight in the face with some force. She stood there, hunched over, while she was pelted with a barrage of rotten produce. A huge tomato hit her in the face and exploded on impact. Half of it hung from the corner of Sarah’s glasses. People seemed to pick up more and more vegetables she did not know where they were all coming from. Cabbages and beetroot came her way. The vegetables were so rotten that they had all turned soft and mushy. They stunk as well. Some were brown and black they were so rotten. The smell was unmistakable. The putrid vegetables rained upon the prone politician. The pillory was covered in pulp, seeds and bits of shredded and exploded vegetables. Sarah puckered her lips and gave a disgusted look. Next someone took a rotten zucchini and approached Sarah. They pushed the rotted green vegetable into her face, waiving it about. They then rubbed it in her face, against her glasses and nose. They pushed it into her mouth. She gagged slightly. They then mashed the zucchini straight into her face, crushing it and spreading its rancid innards in Sarah’s face. The juice, seeds and pulp ran down her face. She blushed bright red with embarrassment. She was quite angry as well. Her colleagues knew better than anyone that she deserved what she was receiving.

Before Sarah could catch her breath two of the members of the crowd were asked to come forward. Each was told to stand opposite one another. They were then give a long rectangular container to hold. They stood on either end. The container looked like it was from a farm. It was explained that the vat contained a large quantity of manure. It was not the hard or lumpy kind of manure either. It was runny, thick and gloppy. The two volunteers stood with the vat inches below Sarah’s chin. The posed for pictures. Sarah raised her eyebrows and clenched every muscle in her body waiting for the inevitable to hit her. “It is going to get dirty in here in a second,” one of the organizers said. They motioned to the volunteers that they could do their thing when they were ready. “Just nail her,” they were told. The two smiled as the crowd urged them on. The raised the vat slightly higher than the top of Sarah’s head. They then turned the vast sideways, emptying the manure onto Sarah Palin’s head. Sarah winced as the revolting, sloppy brown manure poured over her face. Her glasses were covered in it. Manure dripped from her glasses and chin. She experienced the manure with all her senses. She could smell and even taste it in its full glory. The blobs of soft manure covered Sarah’s head. She was totally powerless to even attempt to wipe any of it away. The sensation of seeing Sarah Palin covered in manure was something that thrilled the audience. Hundreds of flashbulbs went off. Everyone paused for a second and took in the sight of Sarah Palin’s face dripping with thick gloppy manure. Sarah could not believe that this was really happening to her. At the moment, all she could really think of was the manure that was all over her face. The brown of the manure matched her brown hair perfectly. Everyone was now chanting “You stink. You stink” at Sarah. This was about as embarrassing as things could possibly get for Sarah, but things were not quite over yet.



Next, two dozen volunteers were given various pies of all sizes and descriptions. They were all lined up about two yards away from the pillory that held Sarah Palin. Sarah wasn’t told what was going to happen, but she could not see at the moment anyway because her glasses and face were covered in manure. One of the organizers shouted out,” Ready, aim, fire.” With that everyone took their pies and began to fling them at the pillory. Sarah screamed as she and the pillory were pelted with a barrage of every type of pie imaginable. Pies flew through the air in all directions. Some fell short, some went sideways and some hit the mark. People staggered their shots so the barrage of pies lasted even longer and was more agonizingly embarrassing for Sarah Palin. At times five pies hit her in the face within three seconds of one another. When the dust cleared, Sarah and the pillory were covered in an array of pink, yellow, brown and white mess. It was a mixture of cream, pudding, pie filling, jam and pie crust. The last pie crust slowly made its way down Sarah’s face before falling on the floor on a pile of pie tins. By this time Sarah’s glasses had been knocked off her head by the force of the pies. One of the organizers leaned over and grabbed them from the pile of mess and pie tins. He took his shirt and cleaned her glasses off on it. He then put them on, mocking the helpless politician. He then placed the cleaned glasses on her messy face.

Finally, half a dozen volunteers lined up together beside the stage. Each of them had paid for the privilege to do this to Sarah.Each of them carried a black sack. It was explained that all of these volunteers had brought their garbage from home and were going to get the chance to dump their garbage on Sarah Palin. “It’s trash time,” the organizer said. The entire place erupted in cheers. One by one the volunteers were allowed to step forward. Each one took the opportunity to voice their displeasure with Sarah Palin’s ideals and policies as the stepped forward. The each stepped forward one at a time. They stood next to the stocks and posed. They then each opened there garbage bags and emptied them over Sarah Palin. One by one total strangers came forward with specially selected trash that they had chosen for Sarah Palin. A lot of the garbage was food waste and leftovers, but every kind of trash imaginable was contained in the trash bags. Some were covered in grime, grease and mould. The volunteers had no mercy on Sarah whatsoever. Bag after bag of filthy, decaying rubbish was poured over Sarah. Some of the garbage was not even identifiable any more. People of every description were in the line to pour their garbage. It included teenagers, old people, rich, pour, fat and skinny. They poured their trash over Sarah’s body. Her clothes were covered and soaked in garbage water. There was not a part of Sarah not covered in garbage by the end. Clumps of food and garbage stuck to her head and glasses. Everything from fish bones, to worms, to maggots covered Sarah.



At last Sarah was allowed out of the pillory. The bar was lifted and she stood up. She wiped some of the trash from her hair and face. She then brushed some of the mess from her skirt and jacket. She tried not to look embarrassed. She stood in front of hundreds of people dripping with sloppy mess. The organizers came forward and announced that they had raised thousands for charity. They thanked Sarah for taking part. Sarah was livid. She glared at them. What could anyone say to being covered in manure and garbage? To top it off, there was nowhere to shower, so Sarah had to go off in her expensive car covered in trash.

The pictures were everywhere after that. Sarah could not go anywhere without seeing a picture of herself in the stocks. Her political opponents even used it in the campaign against her. However, she had made herself look foolish before, so this changed no one’s opinion of her very much at all.