Zelina Vega cage

Zelina Vega cage

Zelina Vega took being annoying to an art form. The way she spoke was clearly designed to irritate people. It was also clear that what she was saying it and how she was saying it must have come directly from Vince McMahon himself, because it was his sort of annoying down to a tee. She was clearly coached on how to speak to be as patronising and as annoying as anyone could possibly be. He then would end whatever she was saying with an arrogant smile or patronising look. She was like nails on a chalkboard.

Zelina had been helping Angel Garza and Andrade to cheap wins against Rey Mysterio and Humberto Carrillo for months on end. She would always interfere in matches so that her men would win. It was getting to the point of being ridiculous. The faces were getting very sick of her constant interference. Because of this, they requested that they face her men in a tag team match with special stipulations attached so that she would not be able to interfere in the match. The stipulations were such that she would be locked in a cage suspended above the ring. This way, she could not interfere in the match. There was also a second stipulation attached that stated that if her team lost, the winners would get to turn her into a human burrito. The fans loved these stipulations. Zelina had done such a good job at annoying everyone that all of the wrestlers and fans were dying to see her get what was coming to her. She deserved to be punished if anyone ever did.

Zelina made a pour choice in outfits for the match wearing a very short and sexy red dress. This gave everyone quite a nice view when she was locked in the cage up her dress. Both teams came to the ring. When the referee escorted her to the shark cage, she pushed him away, telling him to stay away from her. She climbed in the cage, but was seething about it. She argued that she was a lady and did not belong in a cage. Of course, the faces responded that she was no lady and that the only reason that she was being placed in the cage was because she had constantly interfered in matches over and over again. She sat down and crossed her legs. She rolled her eyes and gave her famous pissed off face. The door was locked and the cage was raised above the ring. Of course she tried to act as though she was terrified of heights all of a sudden, as this was usually part of the shtick for this gimmick. 

In shark cage matches there are a lot of tropes. All of them played out in this match. Zelina spent the whole match screaming and yelling in her annoying voice attempting to direct her men and attempting to distract their opponents. She was the main centre of attention of the match, in essence. The camera kept cutting back to her and her shrill, high pitched voice could be heard throughout the match. It did not affect the match too much until the ending. Being in the cage to prevent her from interfering, of course, led to her trying to interfere in the match anyway. As in many of these matches, she tried to drop a foreign object into the ring for her wrestler to hit their opponent with. The twist on this occasion was, the object was caught by the other team. The referee was distracted and the opponent hit Andrade with the object. He comically fell backwards, pretending to be knocked out. He was pinned and the opponents won the match.

Zelina screamed the hold time trying to tell the referee what was happening. She then protested the match. She screamed that the decision was wrong. However, the cage was slowly lowered down into the ring. Zelina’s face dropped, realising that this meant that she would have to receive the forfeit. The crowd were loving this. When the cage door was opened, Zelina attempted to run out of the ring to avoid the punishment. Unfortunately for her, Humberto reached out to grab her, but grabbed the bottom of her dress. The dress ripped off, exposing her bra and panties. She gave a look of shock and anger that only she could give.

She was then handcuffed to the shark cage. She was like a pantomime villain the whole time shouting, kicking and threatening everyone. The two winners looked at each other and smile. The crowd began to chant,” You deserve it”.

They were about to make Zelina into a human burrito. They started with chilli beef. They took their hands and spread globs of it around on her face, hair and chest. She flicked her tongue as if she was trying to bite them. She shouted at them and begged them not to do this. The beef stuck to her hair and face and rolled down her body. Next to come was refried beans. Her mouth flew open as a container of the beans was dumped over her head. The red beans stuck to her face and hair.

Next to come was salsa. They each took industrial sized jugs of salsa and playfully danced around her as they poured it all over her. She made disgusted faces and stuck her tongue out in disgust. Her reactions, predictably, were priceless. Her overacting and super villain character were perfectly suited for such a moment.

Next to come was the nacho cheese sauce. It was sloppy, thick and yellow. It was dumped upon her, but the men had to use their hands to smear it all over her face and her body. Blobs of it dripped everywhere. Sour cream was next to come along with guacamole. Each of the guys took massive catering sized bags of the substances and directed them out all over her face and body. Her sexy Latina boy was soon covered in sloppy mess. Her black hair was streaked with sour cream and guacamole. She screamed, “This stinks”. She was shown pouting, covered in the mess.

Backstage she was seen stomping back to the locker room to get cleaned up. Charley tried to ask her for a comment. She stopped for a brief second and glared at her. She then stomped off. They had finally managed to shut her mouth, at least temporarily.