Victoria Coren gets it from hubby
Victoria Coren was married to David Mitchell. Both were
involved in comedy type shows. They would sometimes appear on comedic panel
type shows. Sometimes they would appear together, sometimes separately. At one
stage, they were asked to appear on one of these together. It was a very
typical sort of set up. They had done these sort of shows many times before. It
was the sort of show where there were teams of three celebrities answering
questions. It was a very familiar format. Everyone thought that it would be
very fun for Victoria and her husband to be on opposite teams, competing
against one another. It was the sort of game that was scored very loosely at
the host’s discretion.
At the beginning, they made a point of saying that the
couple were on opposite teams, competing against one another. It would be
interesting who would win and get the bragging rights. The two teased one
another about how they would beat the other one. It was quite good nature, but
Victoria was slightly more scathing in teasing her husband. She made a few
jokes at his expense as well. Throughout the show this carried on. Victoria
felt that she and the team she was on were much more intelligent. Throughout
the show, the scores were kept a bit of a secret, although it was obvious when
a team scored points. Finally, it came to the end of the show.
“It is time to find out which team has won today. The team
with the most points is David’s team.” He celebrated with his team. Victoria
smiled and congratulated him, looking slightly embarrassed. “Now, David, your
team won. You beat your wife’s team. What we didn’t tell you is that there is a
prize for the winner. As the winner, you now have the pleasure of getting to
gunge your wife, if you so choose to. How does that sound?” “Fabulous, that
sounds amazing.” Victoria laughed. “What are you talking about?,” she mumbled.
“Well, Victoria, your team lost, so your husband is going to get to pour gunge
on you.” She glared at him. “Oh yes, I see, wonderful,” she said sarcastically.
“I am sure that you have always dreamt of getting your own back on your lovely
wife. Victoria was so sure that she would win. It is time for you to get some
revenge upon her. Can you come over here for a second?,” the host asked.
Victoria looked bemused. She had no idea of this was serious or not.
The host asked her to sit in their chair at the centre of
the back of the stage. “Come on now, front and centre, so as everyone can get a
good view.” She reluctantly walked over and had a seat in the chair. She was
still half hoping that this was just a joke. She didn’t really believe that
this would really happen. The host then reached from beneath the desk and
produced a pail filled with bright blue gunge. “Here we have it, lovely blue
gunge, just for Victoria. This one is for all the men out there who have had
never had the opportunity to get their own back on their wives or girlfriends.
I bet a lot of guys out there have always wanted to do this to their wives or
girlfriends. You now get to live out all of their fantasies for them. You get
to gunge your wife.” Victoria looked quite annoyed. “ And yes, later on you and
all the men out there will find out that your wives and girlfriends always have
the last laugh, because we always get revenge. We always get payback in the
end. Might I remind you, that we live together. You have to see me every single
day. I guarantee that I am going to make your life very miserable for weeks to
come. You may get me tonight, but you will live to regret it. You will be
begging me for forgiveness for weeks to come,” she threatened.
“Oh, how do you feel about that?,” the host acts. “It just
makes me want to do it even more,” he laughed. Victoria crossed her arms and
frowned. “Well, I know you are dying to do this, so here is the gunge, when you
are ready you may commence the pouring.” Victoria sighed as her husband took
the pail in his hands and began to gently tip the gunge over her head. Gunge
poured out straight onto the top of her head. She clenched her teeth and closed
her eyes as it poured down the sides of her head, covering her hair. She could
feel that it would soon pour over her face. It soon poured onto her cheeks,
forehead and chin. Some landed on the desk and onto her hands. Gunge poured
down her nose and down her neck. The camera showing the close up of the gunge
pouring over her head and over her face. Her husband poured it slowly, so her
facial expressions could still be seen the entire duration of the gunging. The
gunge pouring onto her light coloured hair. Gunge decorating her face. Some poured
down the back of her neck and down her shoulders. The top have of her dress was
covered. She was wearing a pewter coloured dress with white spots. It was now
splattered with blue gunge all over.
When the pail was empty, he placed it on top of her head. The
handle fell downwards. It looked like some sort of odd chin strap. She snapped
at him, pushing it off almost throwing it at him. He laughed and pulled away. “Sorry,
dear,” he told her. “Shut up,” she moaned,” Liar, you aren’t the least bit
sorry. You loved every minute of that.”
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